Jim And Tracy Put On Fat Suits To See What Life Is Really Like For Awful Fat People
Jim and Tracy go undercover in fat suits to find out how greedy, obnoxious, fat people are discriminated against by the public.
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Epidemiologists Confirm First Airborne Transmission Of Mar-A-Lago Face
Health experts believe the discovery could explain the sudden rise in cases, which rapidly progresses from skin tightness to the sudden onset of severe facial disfigurement. Become an Onion member while it’s still optional: https://membership.theonion.com/?campaign=701a500001geULHAA2
Sony Releases Stupid Piece Of Shit That Doesn’t Fucking Work
Our Tech Trends reporter looks at the new gizmo Sony promises will revolutionize the way consumers become infuriated by goddamn blinking TV box things. For More Breaking News: http://www.theonion.com/video Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/theonion
Colorado Boy Asks Nation Not To Find His Missing Little Brother
Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA The Onion News Network’s Karen Christopher takes you Beyond The Facts, ripping open the chest of news to get to the heart of the story. On this episode, Beyond The Facts talks to the family of missing toddler Aaron Crawford, whose older brother […]
Cases Of Shaken Manchild Syndrome On The Rise
While frustrated parents may feel driven to violently shake their video game-playing grown children who still live at home, it can have serious medical consequences. Ben Stiller also weighs in on the issue. For More Breaking News: http://www.theonion.com/video Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA Like The Onion on Facebook: […]
American Baked Potato Association Study Finds It Best To Load ’Er Up
Recent findings by the ABPA have concluded that the optimal way for Americans to eat a baked potato is to pile that sucker sky with whatever toppings they can get their hands on and just go to town. Become an Onion member while it’s still optional: https://membership.theonion.com/?campaign=701a500001geULHAA2
Study Finds Youths Don’t Follow Office Politics
Organizations hope to make youth see importance of getting prime parking spaces or a new desk lamp.
Being A Detective Who Talks To Ghosts Not As Exciting As TV
On Today Now! paranormal detective Leonard Higgs explains that using ghosts to solve crimes actually involves a lot of paperwork.
12-Year-Old Boy Scouts Offer To Give Breast Exams
Two prospective Eagle Scouts explain how they are preventing breast cancer by helping women examine their breasts. For More Breaking News: http://www.theonion.com/video Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/theonion
Compost-Fueled Cars: Wouldn’t That Be Great? – Onion Talks – Ep. 1
Young media professional Cameron Hughes delivers a compelling argument for his vision of the future–one filled with cars powered by compost. He outlines the idea he came up with in detail, leaving the formalities for other visionaries in other fields. One thing is for certain: he already came up with […]
