A Very Fatal Murder Episode 5, Part 1: Did My Police Department Miss Something?
In the first part of an extra-long and incredibly poignant episode of “A Very Fatal Murder,” David returns to the Bluff Springs Police Department to search the evidence locker in hopes of finding the long-lost key to Hayley Price’s Murder.
Become an Onion member while it’s still optional: https://membership.theonion.com/?campaign=701a500001geULHAA2
@breadcrumbhoarder
May 16, 2026 at 3:01 pm
The evidence locker bit, I can’t stop laughing 😂
@vortex7308
May 16, 2026 at 3:01 pm
I think the fact that David is heterosexual is somehow the biggest plot twist in this entire series because what do you mean that man married, had sex, and raised a child with a *woman*???
@doogalfan0017
May 16, 2026 at 3:01 pm
This went from Twin Peaks to Naked Gun fast
@fadinggavin3974
May 16, 2026 at 3:01 pm
Chief of police😂😂😂 hahahah
@thunderatigervideo
May 16, 2026 at 3:01 pm
“Did I know more than I was letting on?” I’m stealing that. Absolutely brilliant!
@s1ddh4r7h.p
May 16, 2026 at 3:01 pm
I need David to speak with daily dose of internet
@DivineJenkem
May 16, 2026 at 3:01 pm
5:19 she sounds like Olivia from Sid and Olivia
@renpupyt4343
May 16, 2026 at 3:01 pm
Most time I've ever said "ugh, this asshole" in a 9 minute period
@ghosty0738
May 16, 2026 at 3:01 pm
Horrible. Just horrible.
@JoshS-u9l
May 16, 2026 at 3:01 pm
Did my police department piss off Trazyn the Infinite???
@nomore2863
May 16, 2026 at 3:01 pm
"Brian didn't fly close enough" 😂😂😂
@WittyUsername816
May 16, 2026 at 3:01 pm
"You could even say I was the one who insisted he try."
Oh my god.
@DanielR123-21
May 16, 2026 at 3:01 pm
He becomes the head of police… just to treat himself as a different character anyways.
@kierangainer
May 16, 2026 at 3:01 pm
another classic that wont be appreciated for 7 years
@dimethylhexane
May 16, 2026 at 3:01 pm
so fucking poignant holy shit
@kylepucalik4334
May 16, 2026 at 3:01 pm
wait, who's "Hayley?!" I thought this was a metaphor for the golden age of television.
@WibblyWobbly1905
May 16, 2026 at 3:01 pm
Zip Zap Zop reference?!?!?!
@sanninjiraiya
May 16, 2026 at 3:01 pm
Someone at the Onion has very strong opinions about Ira Glass and NPR
@BritneyLazonga
May 16, 2026 at 3:01 pm
"Whats going on in my office" LAWL that killed me
@chriseidam7319
May 16, 2026 at 3:01 pm
I don’t know if Dave will ever solve this case, but if Dave does solve this case, you just know that he won’t get the recognition he rightly deserves, and I think that he is partially to blame because he doesn’t promote himself enough. If he doesn’t put himself out there, how will people recognize his genius?
@jonathanwatson4484
May 16, 2026 at 3:01 pm
…. is … is David the killer?
@patrickdabs
May 16, 2026 at 3:01 pm
David is the real victim here.
@Bingbangboompowwham
May 16, 2026 at 3:01 pm
love the True Detective landscapeface
@Ottomatic222
May 16, 2026 at 3:01 pm
Great, just what I needed, longer videos to watch, and a series to boot! Thanks a lot The Onion for the burden of all the free entertainment!
@Jack-tu5yr
May 16, 2026 at 3:01 pm
lmao holy shit idk why but this episode hits so hard
@Robotfan987
May 16, 2026 at 3:01 pm
Holy fuck I'm so glad I didn't skip part one there's so many details I'll probably forget until someone in a reddit thread reminds me because I wasn't paying super close attention to this episode because I was scrolling instagram. Anyways love from St. Louis
@scarlettuppenberg940
May 16, 2026 at 3:01 pm
cinema
@pariskitty777
May 16, 2026 at 3:01 pm
Do Canton in Massachussettes.
@incoggneeto6937
May 16, 2026 at 3:01 pm
See, the moon is getting mentioned ALOT… I think the moon might have done it…..
@RadDad419
May 16, 2026 at 3:01 pm
I saw this post and I am like, "What the hell is this? Is this worth listening to?"
OMG, this breaks my brain. It is so funny and "poignant" at the same time. The irony is girder-level as the structure for it all.
@donaldwesterhazy9333
May 16, 2026 at 3:01 pm
Seems like yesterday.
@laurabustos6560
May 16, 2026 at 3:01 pm
The hardscrabble cussing thrown into the poignant prose and the hard boiled 'turning of the little circular thing on the gun' really make him a true old fashioned dick in classic noir fashion.
@InfiniteAnvil
May 16, 2026 at 3:01 pm
Holy shit, how did I miss this when it was new
@sphinxtheeminx
May 16, 2026 at 3:01 pm
A wind turbine or a windmill – we know where Trump stands on this, but I am conflicted.
Comments are closed.