Pretend You Give A Shit About The Election
Our morning show’s political correspondent offers tips on how you can seem informed about politics without picking up a single newspaper.
The Onion
Newsroom : Tiny Dog Has Been Barking Nonstop For 6 Years
Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA Pausing only to eat, the West Highland white terrier yips and yelps 24 hours a day, according to neighbors. Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/theonion More Breaking News: http://www.theonion.com/video/
Hollow Point Bullets Recalled That Don’t Explode In Targets
Steel Hawk Inc. is offering a full refund to customers who bought the non-flesh-shredding bullets. For More Breaking News: http://www.theonion.com/video Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/theonion
Prague’s Kafka International Named Most Alienating Airport
Business Week ranked the airport last in customer satisfaction due to long delays, bureaucratic employees, and overall oppressive atmosphere.
DNA Evidence Frees Black Man Convicted Of Bear Attack
Georgia police were so confident Marshall was the man who killed young Janet Kelly in a state bear preserve, they didn’t investigate other suspects.
Nation’s Girlfriends Unveil New Economic Plan: ‘Let’s Move In Together’
Girlfriends’ spokesperson Kelly Ambrose joins us in the Financial Fallout Shelter to discuss why Boyfriends moving in with them just makes fiscal sense right now.
Ultra-Realistic Modern Warfare Game Features Awaiting Orders, Repairing Trucks
Designers say the new game explores the endless paperwork, routine patrolling a modern day soldier endures in photorealistic detail.
New Psychedelic Weight Loss Drug Transforms Food Into Monstrous Hallucinations
Season 2 Preview – Watch The Onion On TV Tues 10/4 at 10/9c only on IFC. New diet pill, Hallucex, yields tremendous results in curbing appetite by tricking patients into thinking their food has turned into a horrifying, bloodthirsty demon.
Today Now! Host Undergoes Horrifically Painful Surgery Live On Air
Jim Haggerty helps to raise awareness about kidney stones by undergoing an operation in front of cameras. Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/theonion
New Prius Helps Environment By Killing Its Owner
Toyota’s new Prius Solution reduces its driver’s carbon footprint to zero by impaling them through the lungs with spikes as soon as they get in the car. Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/theonion
