Why “Disarm” is The Smashing Pumpkins’ Most Traumatic Song
“Disarm” by The Smashing Pumpkins begins with its haunting bells and Billy Corgan’s vulnerable delivery. Today we trace the song’s roots to Billy’s fractured Chicago childhood—marked by early divorce, instability, and years shuttled between relatives—which left deep resentment toward his parents. In 1992, during an eight-month depression that included suicidal ideation, Corgan wrote the track (alongside “Today”) in a single morning, channeling suppressed anger into lyrics that confront inherited pain while cloaking it in a gentle, disarming smile. We look at it all, from the turbulent Siamese Dream sessions in Georgia, where band conflicts, addiction, and Corgan’s near-total instrumental control unfolded under pressure, to how “Disarm” emerged as a fragile acoustic standout, enriched on the spot with orchestral strings, glockenspiel, and cello. This is the story of “Disarm” and why it’s The Smashing Pumpkins’ most traumatic song.
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✉️ Read the transcript & hear the music on the Poetic Wax Substack: https://poeticwax.substack.com
WATCH NEXT:
✓ Mayonaise: The Inside Joke That Became One of the Smashing Pumpkins’ Best Songs: https://youtu.be/6RiMSiWTsoU
✓ Let Down: The Radiohead Song That Nearly Broke The Band (Then Became a Chart Hit 28 Years Later): https://youtu.be/cib584GTSWk
✓ Today: The Smashing Pumpkins Song That Saved Billy Corgan’s Life: https://youtu.be/sHrImJFDuYM
🎥 Smashing Pumpkins on Poetic Wax: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLylroYWVYWWW9lI-SrU4IgSctCqMEOMdx
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Poetic Wax is hosted by Andy Fenstermaker.
CHAPTERS:
0:00 The Story of Disarm
1:11 Echoes of a Fractured Home
4:15 The Birth of a Melody in Despair
6:59 Layers of Sound, Sorrow, and Storms in the Studio
9:51 Ripples of Release and Reaction
12:46 An Anthem For Quiet Battles
SELECT REFERENCES & CLIPS:
The Smashing Pumpkins “Disarm” (Official Music Video) https://youtu.be/d1acEVmnVhI?si=hDublnA5mxCWoCjG
The Smashing Pumpkins on VH1 Storytellers: https://youtu.be/MJoPEiSNXEk?si=5CAKguNvtZiwuaGp
The Smashing Pumpkins “Disarm” Live on MTV Most Wanted with Ray Cokes (1993) https://youtu.be/7M9os0a12fY?si=H8r7JTQHe6i9OE18
Billy Corgan Explains “Disarm” on Howard Stern Show https://youtu.be/GxmGyJrvDi4?si=lLW3fxufRfva1UQY
Billy Corgan and Perry Farrell Open Up About Tough Upbringings (Howard Stern Show): https://youtu.be/qGLxM-nESiU?si=YFLz9dFOllG26bx8
The Smashing Pumpkins – Disarm live at MTV Video Music Awards 1994: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kAPPciGdvPY
The Kolberg Glockenspiel: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CyHBkwPguP4
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@AMD-q4s
May 31, 2026 at 4:39 am
An absolute perfect album.
I can’t listen to disarm without tears streaming. Not sure how he recorded this without balling every time. Such pain in that song. The video is just as haunting….hugs to Billy.
@sexobscura
May 31, 2026 at 4:39 am
I'm still in therapy due to listening to this highly traumatic song
@derekstalb
May 31, 2026 at 4:39 am
All in All I was a victim of Physical, Mental, Emotional, Partial Sexual abuse by a co-worker Lady, and some neglect. All GOD’S honest Truth here. Just so SAD, speaking for myself only.
@derekstalb
May 31, 2026 at 4:39 am
I’m deeply sorry for Mr. Billy Corgan, I came from a highly dysfunctional family Our family never really discussed the emotions and feelings I felt growing up. I was bullied horribly everyday at school, couldn’t talk about much of anything I was going through. Just felt trapped by everything. I got saved Christ although at age 8. That helped GREATLY. But still was going through so much extreme SHIT constantly. Screamed at all the time, even yelled at by My Mom and Dad as well. But now things have gotten a bit better, but still I never felt why Almighty GOD put me here and why GOD even created me at all… Living for me was and still always is a HELL for me.
@broeheemed32
May 31, 2026 at 4:39 am
Some of their music is really good, but I just couldn't stomach that hyper-whiny voice. Should have hired a lead vocalist.
@davidyurch4446
May 31, 2026 at 4:39 am
As far as the Smashing Pumpkins song that's the most traumatic to listen to, "X.Y.U." is my pick.
@paulflur4519
May 31, 2026 at 4:39 am
I like Billy’s early music but I don’t care for him at all as a person.
@melodyblackhall6702
May 31, 2026 at 4:39 am
Disarm is still one of my favorite songs. It's so beautiful and sad. I know alot alot of people criticize Billy's vocals but his vocals were incredibly important to and worked perfectly (specifically for Disarm) and it's painful lyrics.
@chrissturgeon1571
May 31, 2026 at 4:39 am
First time I heard this track was through blown-out shitty speakers, standing in line up to rent ski gear. I was 15 years old and it hit me hard! Still have the album on rotation to this day.
@lordfizzz
May 31, 2026 at 4:39 am
I had a bootleg tee shirt my uncle got me from Singapore when he worked for mastercard. It was the back of corgans head with soccer ball pattern imposed on it and it said smashing pumpkicks I thought I was the coolest kid. Then I got older and some of his music ripped my guts out. What a guy
@OldManMTB-jh3yi
May 31, 2026 at 4:39 am
Disarm and Today are two of my all time favorite songs. I connected with SP the first moment I heard Gish and followed them to Ava Adore. I guess I never completely got why the pull to these two songs until this video. Thanks. This was great.
@gigiwilson9124
May 31, 2026 at 4:39 am
Please get a HAIRCUT!!!🤯💇♂️💇♂️
@DanellePainter
May 31, 2026 at 4:39 am
I met Billy back in 2004. He was an asshole. A friend had warned me. But I don’t care, they are still one of my fave bands of all time. The melodies + lyrics still resonate w/ my life. 🖤
@sstaners1234
May 31, 2026 at 4:39 am
Some of the hardest hitting songs are the ones that are born out of pain.
@Louisenjoyswriting
May 31, 2026 at 4:39 am
The lines that spoke the most to me "I used to be a little boy, so old in my shoes". Those two beautiful lines make the entire song. Abuse ages a child spiritually in many different ways. There are a bunch of different songs about abuse, that was the first one to come out and acknowledge those hidden psychological effects.
@t.sheppard5940
May 31, 2026 at 4:39 am
Geek U.S.A. is the greatest hard rock composition of that decade. When the band kicks back in for "then I knew we'd be forsaken…" that's the soaring height of the mid 90s. Disarm is just ok. Very overplayed.
@filippøi
May 31, 2026 at 4:39 am
It's a common misconception but the Smashing Pumpkins never were under the banner or label of Grunge.
@TheWosniakGambit
May 31, 2026 at 4:39 am
Something about this album as a whole….it just gets better the older I get. I liked it just fine when it came out, but in my mind it was overshadowed by Core or Nevermind or Superunkown. Now though its pretty close to the top of the 90s heap. Anyway, fascinating stuff. The essence of destructive, cruel reality being channeled into something amazing and constructive
@hansgettheflammenwerfer69420
May 31, 2026 at 4:39 am
yes another poetic wax video to watch right as im getting ready to record. the universe is kind
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