When dealing with issues, other people tend to shame you or make you feel worse, being surprised as if we are incapable of such feelings. They tell you're weak or that you should "man up" etc. It's not worth sharing these problems with other people sometimes when you're in a toxic circle. No one can really be trusted.
Whew taking in kids immediately thinking about the impact on my kids. My mom took in a nephew and it completely opened up the door for my brothers to go rouge- he exposed them too a lot of negative stuff and it was never the same. Hard hard decisions
We tell men all the time …men don’t care about men’s mental health … but expecting your woman and or women at large to carry it for you.. or to help you hold it it’s a lot to ask
I didn’t realize how common this was until I went to college. For context, my mom is a clinical psychologist (retired now) who also battles depression (as do I) so I was very fortunate to be aware of it and not be embarrassed to discuss it. I really didn’t get how unique this was until I was a young adult.
Im late to this but sorry to hear and wish the best for her and her kids. Take care of your family and yourself physically and mentally. If you work yourself into the ground youre not helping anyone. And your right about the groups helping it gives a different viewpoint.
How about speaking on men in general. What does this have to do with race. Men’s mental health in general needs to be talked about race shouldn’t even breach the conversation. This is what I hate about this dude. Yes plenty of issues need to be addressed and corrected when it comes to the black community like equal pay yatta. But when the topic is significantly broader than just black people you never make that leap. You sit in your little bubble and talk about exclusively how it affects your people only. Incredibly disappointing but i should’ve seen that coming from someone so liberal. (I am not a conservative what so ever)
Hey man this was some real shit. All the male role models in my life are dealing with the same type of mental and emotional load from family and community. And now that I’m getting older, I am too. It’s a lot sometimes
Suffered from depression in the past, had a break down at 18, no one gave a shit, took years to pull myself out, trust me i get why black men keep it to themselves, sad this is how it is. I have alot of empathy and understanding for people who are suffering.
I really enjoyed listening to this. I think this is true for most black men. I'm from Africa, and I think what you say is true for our men here as well. And mental heyis an even more taboo topic, at least in my country. But it is slowly being talked about more often.
I kind of identity with this but in a different way. People have asked me about depression and I wondered if I was 'til I came across a forum discussion on "are you depressed or just don't give a f-." I think a significant portion of the diagnosis of something like depression is cultural. When you lack the will to do what you're "supposed" to be doing people start wondering. In the 80s I lived in Europe. I was living my best life but got stupid and came back to the US 'cuz family, "the next phase" (life as performance), etc. After a few months I was like "this is BS."" I kept pretending for a few more years 'til I finally admitted I was not depressed but would be that and much worse if I didn't leave this sh*t behind. I stair-stepped down -> early retirement -> part-time work "to keep busy" -> finally letting go of this whole system. Thru it all I was always candid about my disdain for what I find to be a blatantly extractive, all take and no give system (especially for those who have been othered) so that when I let it all go nobody was surprised. The first step to good mental health is figuring out who are or want to be and then the second step is having the courage to be that.
Not quite the same situation, but very close to home:
My sister has been in poor health for some time (Huntington's Disease is a bitch y'all), and recently attempted suicide. It put a real concern in the family, what would happen to her two sons (my nephews). They're 14 and 16 (going on 17) and their dad is also not in the picture (and honestly just a total bum). With her health in steady decline we all want to do what we can to help her, and make sure the boys have the resources and structure needed to take care of them. The boys even asked at one point if I could take them in, and to which I can only say is, I don't know. I'm struggling just to take care of my own things right now, let alone take in two teenagers. We're lucky in that there's a number of people in the family that pull together and help, but that's still a tough one.
Godspeed to your family F.D. I hope everything is going well, and Godspeed to everyone in similar struggles to this. This is a tough world, and it doesn't pull its punches.
@sumara6641
July 7, 2026 at 3:31 am
The caffeine causes anxiety and depression in certain people. He needs to come off the red bull and use coffee only about twice a week.
@Manny_Taharqa
July 7, 2026 at 3:31 am
When dealing with issues, other people tend to shame you or make you feel worse, being surprised as if we are incapable of such feelings. They tell you're weak or that you should "man up" etc. It's not worth sharing these problems with other people sometimes when you're in a toxic circle. No one can really be trusted.
@what_a_phantasy9962
July 7, 2026 at 3:31 am
Thank you for sharing your experience.
@SeanTwoTimes
July 7, 2026 at 3:31 am
I believe my father suffered from John Heneyism
@charlisianecole
July 7, 2026 at 3:31 am
Whew taking in kids immediately thinking about the impact on my kids. My mom took in a nephew and it completely opened up the door for my brothers to go rouge- he exposed them too a lot of negative stuff and it was never the same. Hard hard decisions
@JordynHealing
July 7, 2026 at 3:31 am
Love you Fiq <3 praying for your cousin and her children
@rendring
July 7, 2026 at 3:31 am
Here after the missles in Iran, FD was right about another world war coming in a few months
@melaniemeans3240
July 7, 2026 at 3:31 am
We tell men all the time …men don’t care about men’s mental health … but expecting your woman and or women at large to carry it for you.. or to help you hold it it’s a lot to ask
@WHBJr
July 7, 2026 at 3:31 am
Because no one cares!
@sullyb23511
July 7, 2026 at 3:31 am
Joe Budden was horribly insensitive.
@pelicansmakingsounds
July 7, 2026 at 3:31 am
I didn’t realize how common this was until I went to college. For context, my mom is a clinical psychologist (retired now) who also battles depression (as do I) so I was very fortunate to be aware of it and not be embarrassed to discuss it. I really didn’t get how unique this was until I was a young adult.
@frizzlefry5
July 7, 2026 at 3:31 am
Im late to this but sorry to hear and wish the best for her and her kids. Take care of your family and yourself physically and mentally. If you work yourself into the ground youre not helping anyone. And your right about the groups helping it gives a different viewpoint.
@ByteMe00000
July 7, 2026 at 3:31 am
How about speaking on men in general. What does this have to do with race. Men’s mental health in general needs to be talked about race shouldn’t even breach the conversation. This is what I hate about this dude. Yes plenty of issues need to be addressed and corrected when it comes to the black community like equal pay yatta. But when the topic is significantly broader than just black people you never make that leap. You sit in your little bubble and talk about exclusively how it affects your people only. Incredibly disappointing but i should’ve seen that coming from someone so liberal. (I am not a conservative what so ever)
@mochachinomonahan8462
July 7, 2026 at 3:31 am
All my blessings to your cousin and if you need some for yourself Fiq …🙏🏾❤️
@gl0cktopus
July 7, 2026 at 3:31 am
Hey man this was some real shit. All the male role models in my life are dealing with the same type of mental and emotional load from family and community. And now that I’m getting older, I am too. It’s a lot sometimes
@cmair77
July 7, 2026 at 3:31 am
Suffered from depression in the past, had a break down at 18, no one gave a shit, took years to pull myself out, trust me i get why black men keep it to themselves, sad this is how it is. I have alot of empathy and understanding for people who are suffering.
@adonaiel-rohi2460
July 7, 2026 at 3:31 am
The misery Cycle ends when we stop reproducing. Why are we having kids?
@samukelephiri6310
July 7, 2026 at 3:31 am
I really enjoyed listening to this. I think this is true for most black men. I'm from Africa, and I think what you say is true for our men here as well. And mental heyis an even more taboo topic, at least in my country. But it is slowly being talked about more often.
@kendallcook9722
July 7, 2026 at 3:31 am
I kind of identity with this but in a different way. People have asked me about depression and I wondered if I was 'til I came across a forum discussion on "are you depressed or just don't give a f-." I think a significant portion of the diagnosis of something like depression is cultural. When you lack the will to do what you're "supposed" to be doing people start wondering.
In the 80s I lived in Europe. I was living my best life but got stupid and came back to the US 'cuz family, "the next phase" (life as performance), etc. After a few months I was like "this is BS."" I kept pretending for a few more years 'til I finally admitted I was not depressed but would be that and much worse if I didn't leave this sh*t behind.
I stair-stepped down -> early retirement -> part-time work "to keep busy" -> finally letting go of this whole system. Thru it all I was always candid about my disdain for what I find to be a blatantly extractive, all take and no give system (especially for those who have been othered) so that when I let it all go nobody was surprised.
The first step to good mental health is figuring out who are or want to be and then the second step is having the courage to be that.
@bw5020
July 7, 2026 at 3:31 am
Imma come around back to this. Like medicine, I know I need it…
@RubeusArchos
July 7, 2026 at 3:31 am
Well said
@alicekingston8521
July 7, 2026 at 3:31 am
Not quite the same situation, but very close to home:
My sister has been in poor health for some time (Huntington's Disease is a bitch y'all), and recently attempted suicide. It put a real concern in the family, what would happen to her two sons (my nephews). They're 14 and 16 (going on 17) and their dad is also not in the picture (and honestly just a total bum). With her health in steady decline we all want to do what we can to help her, and make sure the boys have the resources and structure needed to take care of them. The boys even asked at one point if I could take them in, and to which I can only say is, I don't know. I'm struggling just to take care of my own things right now, let alone take in two teenagers. We're lucky in that there's a number of people in the family that pull together and help, but that's still a tough one.
Godspeed to your family F.D. I hope everything is going well, and Godspeed to everyone in similar struggles to this. This is a tough world, and it doesn't pull its punches.