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Being A Detective Who Talks To Ghosts Not As Exciting As TV

The Onion | March 24, 2026



On Today Now! paranormal detective Leonard Higgs explains that using ghosts to solve crimes actually involves a lot of paperwork.

Written by The Onion

Comments

This post currently has 34 comments.

  1. @allature

    March 24, 2026 at 4:59 pm

    I'm just concerned that his problem with contacting a ghost in the studio is: "It will take a while to make contact." but not: "I have no reason to believe there is even a ghost here."

  2. @hatoftimelord

    March 24, 2026 at 4:59 pm

    I can see a ghost in here, he died in 1550, he doesn't speak English well, but he knows a couple of phases.

    Um, he said there was a um, not repeating that word, who was using a flashing box. Not sure if he means phone, camera or metal detector, to be honest…. And oh, wait I think he's talking about 3 years ago.

    I think he might not have been in the room when the murder happened. He doesn't seem to know what I'm talking about. Although that might be the language barrier. Or maybe he doesn't want to tell me because I'm a women, it's hard to tell.

  3. @rebelwolf1776

    March 24, 2026 at 4:59 pm

    How dare you make fun of terminal illnesses, hope that you learn how unfunny terminal cases are. I almost subscribed to your channel until I saw how inappropriate and cruel you people are, like mocking quadriplegic individuals. A plague on all your houses.

  4. @telforddisservicesandco

    March 24, 2026 at 4:59 pm

    Using my special psychic talent, I predict that Leonard will make a fortune from publishing a best selling book about how to be hugely successful, investing in the products offered by already established and well funded business facilities, such as casinos and off-track gambling institutions.

  5. @woltan1979

    March 24, 2026 at 4:59 pm

    "I have already talked to your producer about this, it just wouldn't make good TV.."

    "But…that's not possible, we were just briefed this morning that he died of a heart attack last night"

    "Yeah, I know. He just told me about that meeting too".

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