Town’s Teen-Pregnancy Spike Due To One Impressive Youth
(From ONN on IFC TV, Fridays 10/9c) In local news from Pennington, IL, a handsome teen who owns his own truck is responsible for over half of new pregnancies. More local news at WONN5.com.
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Man Who Shit Pants In Grade School Awarded Purple Heart
Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA In local news, a hero soldier from Pennington, IL is awarded for his service in Afghanistan barely ten years after he shit his pants in fourth grade. Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/theonion More Breaking News: http://www.theonion.com/video/
