Pretend That You Love Me
A film about dating, love, art and pain.
Support –
Patreon: https://patreon.com/joelhaver
Paypal: https://bit.ly/2ZI7uff
Social –
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/joelhaver
Drawings: https://www.instagram.com/joeldrawsandwriteshaver
Letterboxd: https://letterboxd.com/joelhaver
@Joel-Haver
December 11, 2025 at 7:31 pm
I've been working on this film for almost a year now and am beyond excited to finally share it. It is a deeply personal film and I hope it can offer people some sort of catharsis like it has for me. The film will be available here, for free, indefinitely, I understand if you choose to come back and watch it some other time. Thanks for your time and, as always, if you make a movie I'll watch it too.
EDIT: Thank you for all the lovely comments, I’m reading them all and doing my best to respond. I recommend watching the movie before reading the comments as they might give too much away.
@tastypesos
December 11, 2025 at 7:31 pm
A hard but cathartic watch for me. God you're brave, dude.
@magnusr.poulsen2437
December 11, 2025 at 7:31 pm
This has been on my watch list for 5 years.
In an ironic way, 25 year old Magnus then, could have used this just as much as 30 year old Magnus now.
In between – maybe not, but at least I'm not pretending anymore.
Thank you Joel.
@Messy334
December 11, 2025 at 7:31 pm
Joel doesnt act in his movies, but the actors do
@deadmanwalkinn
December 11, 2025 at 7:31 pm
life is tough for waterboys
@datboi7847
December 11, 2025 at 7:31 pm
Absolutely amazing, one of the greatest filmmakers I've ever seen
@HubSheep
December 11, 2025 at 7:31 pm
just discovered this guy, WOW! I swear I thought this was a hidden camera show then i noticed the microphones they were all wearing, truly amazing!
@firebal6129
December 11, 2025 at 7:31 pm
spoilers
For the first act you’re thinking the whole time “why are their multiple girls”? I was thinking maybe they’ll keep dropping until only one goes the distance. But then Act 2…the whole thing is so recontextualized…it’s really good
@firebal6129
December 11, 2025 at 7:31 pm
Just wanted to touch on two things that aren’t being appreciated enough: 1, I love the lack of music. It’s not often that a film relies just on its story and actors to sell the emotion.
2. Great cinematography / shot choreography or whatever it’s called. The long stills are so refreshing to hollywoods content cuts.
Both of these things really help to make it feel so much more real and authentic, without contrivance. Great work! I applaud you
@Famfuma
December 11, 2025 at 7:31 pm
That last scene was so hard to watchhh 🦧💔
@sheikhasadali9070
December 11, 2025 at 7:31 pm
This is hands down the best thing I ever watched on Youtube.
@awilddevereaux
December 11, 2025 at 7:31 pm
No better way to manipulate a girl into making out with you than to invite her to your apartment to "work on a movie" and then cry like a baby.
this movie is Joel's "Scott Pilgrim"
@EelisSealard
December 11, 2025 at 7:31 pm
Thank you for this Joel, this is a truly special film that I, along with many others, find beautiful and have been impacted by in our own ways. It's a film that means a lot to me personally and is both incredibly comforting and uncomfortable in all the right ways. What a great mind and a wonderful heart you have, Mr. Haver.
@bautibonzini2835
December 11, 2025 at 7:31 pm
Coming back just to check the staging and blocking of the final shot. So simple yet so genius.
@maalls
December 11, 2025 at 7:31 pm
the part she says romance was pretty scripted, was it scripted?
@DaveKovalComedy
December 11, 2025 at 7:31 pm
I can't tell if "Nickleback was one of the biggest bands of the early 90s" was somebody fucking up the dialogue or a joke
@DaveKovalComedy
December 11, 2025 at 7:31 pm
I haven't finished the film yet but so far it seems like a lovely tale about polyamory <3
@dev.b.breaker
December 11, 2025 at 7:31 pm
even if you drown loneliness in love it's still gonna be there…. that's ok. I mean it sucks but it's ok
@SLOTHIGER
December 11, 2025 at 7:31 pm
Hey Joel,
I just recently found you, which is another way of saying I found myself. You are a creator of connections, and I can only admire how the fabric you've been weaving have brought together so many people and feelings.
You've been the sharer, but I now want now to (parasocially) share with you part of a poem (author: Hanif Abdurraqib)
The bad news is that you will lose people you love,
The good news is that you'll never stop loving them,
the good news is that there will be more people to love and the best news is that you can tell them about the people you miss and maybe they'll learn to love them through you.
The bad news is that the heart can break in infinite ways, I suppose the good news is that with that in mind, you'll only experience a fraction of them in a lifetime.
The bad news is the world will become more cruel, good news is that you don't have to, if you work hard at it
which is another way of saying the bad news is that you don't stop feeling everything and the good news is that you don't stop feeling everything.
Love from a place physically faraway from you, but close in the heart
Davide
@BarackObamaJedi
December 11, 2025 at 7:31 pm
I periodically go back to this film. At times it's cathartic. Other times, not so much. It's vicarious, estranging, alienating. Sorry, that's my own fault, probably.
I'm not normal and I love that. I trust strangers over friends, because you're not surprised if one stabs you. All enemies used to be friends, and possibly they will be. So actually, I would be less surprised if a friend stabbed me. I see the same 5 people over 20 times before randomly meeting a stranger for the second time. If a Judas exists, 1/5 is higher chance than 1/100. They have a motive, the means, and the opportunity. It's quick, easy, and free. It's obvious, a non-thinker, a deterministic self-fulfilling prophecy. Just wheels turning fate into the event, and events into fate. Confirming our nature is to pledge to give the same inheritance to our children that we received, to make life that noisy shit, signifying nothing.
But why are strange and stranger considered to be the same, and so any stranger is strange and the strange are to be estranged?
@marcoberto9256
December 11, 2025 at 7:31 pm
This is a masterpiece, i feel so empathetic with you in the movie and it feels like staring at a mirror, i LOVE IT and I could never thank you enough for this.
@letsfuckngo
December 11, 2025 at 7:31 pm
Dax brought me here
@rubenhinze7695
December 11, 2025 at 7:31 pm
Can I just point out how incredible this thumbnail is? It's so simple, but every time I see it with that title, it's a gut punch and I'm brought to the edge of tears.
I'm currently on my 2nd year of a 4 year Graphic Design Illustration course and we have to work our asses off, pulling all nighters on a regular basis just to get the bare minimum requirements to pass done because they are so obsessed with quality, but then I see this thumbnail that looks like it was made in Microsoft paint in less than an hour and I'm reminded why I took this course and that its not the "quality" and superficial "standards" of an Illustration that matters, its what it says and how it makes you feel.
@NathanKist
December 11, 2025 at 7:31 pm
Hey, Joel. I've been watching your stuff for a while, probably a year before this came out. When you posted this it touched me in a way nothing else really has. This film has always been that example for me about how art can be a tool for expression, and your work here speaks to me in a way I can't really understand. I come back to it every year and it still connects. I appreciate everything you put in to this. You really make art in a way I could only hope. Thank you.
@allegedwriter
December 11, 2025 at 7:31 pm
It took me five years to get to this but I'm so glad I watched it.
Comments are closed.