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Body language expert: 7 cues that make you instantly more likable | Full Interview

Big Think | June 6, 2026



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You only have a few seconds to make a first impression, and the non-verbal cues you’re sending may be silently working against any kindness your words communicate. Charisma is learned, not innate, and even if you consider yourself an “awkward” person, you can still hack positive reception.

Body language expert Vanessa van Edwards shares a genius formula to create a lasting first impression while debunking body-language myths and these mistakes you’re probably making in social situations.

0:00 Chapter 1: How to make a great first impression
1:24 The two things everyone judges you on
9:13 Body language moves that build instant trust
17:56 Chapter 2: How to understand and read people
24:04 How to read negative cues before it’s too late
28:42 Chapter 3: How to be conversationally present
34:03 The body language habits that kill your listening presence
41:00 How to know when it’s your turn to talk
42:34 Chapter 4: The psychology of power and engagement
49:51 How to stop sounding monotone (even if you know your stuff)
54:14 The finishing touches that make you unforgettable

Read the video transcript ► https://bigthink.com/series/full-interview/body-language-first-impression/?utm_source=youtube&utm_medium=video&utm_campaign=youtube_description

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About Vanessa Van Edwards:

Vanessa Van Edwards is a behavioral researcher, bestselling author, and founder of Science of People. For two decades she’s turned the science of human behavior into practical tools that help people communicate with confidence. She’s taught in Harvard University’s Division of Continuing Education and authored the bestselling books Captivate and Cues in 18+ languages. Her work has reached 100+ million learners through videos, courses, and keynotes at Harvard, MIT, Stanford, SXSW, and with teams at Google, Microsoft, Amazon, Meta, Comcast, and more.

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Comments

This post currently has 48 comments.

  7. @maguscluster

    June 6, 2026 at 7:01 am

    I hate this. I hate that I have to think about this. I hate that I'm watching this video. I just wanna be myself and not feel any anxiety about how people will react to me.

  10. @yzfr1q2w

    June 6, 2026 at 7:01 am

    speaking like a guided recording is not charisma. also it has nothing to do with body language. it is not learned. it`s genetics.

  12. @Chitown_cookin

    June 6, 2026 at 7:01 am

    “Fake charisma” is pretending to be someone you’re not. Learning communication skills is making sure who you really are actually comes across to other people. Big difference.

  13. @AwesomeAdamTwelve

    June 6, 2026 at 7:01 am

    Does anyone else find the white void surrounded by tons of objects in full sharp detail really distracting from what's being said?
    I like long videos but this is really screwing with my focus.

  14. @maphesto

    June 6, 2026 at 7:01 am

    This woman has always bothered me for some reason. Like Kelly Mcgonical and her “willpower” movement that lasted 5 minutes this is junk science for housewives to read at the airport

  15. @danceswithgnomes1

    June 6, 2026 at 7:01 am

    Anyone saying she's advocating for manipulation hasn't watched the video. She is providing tools to better navigate socializing. Its a skill, and understanding social cues allows you to align your intentions with what you put out into the world.

    For anyone who overthinks socializing or has social anxiety, these cues provide the tools to understand and communicate with others. She makes it a point to stress how important it is to be authentic.

  17. @BubbleGendut

    June 6, 2026 at 7:01 am

    Develop a false persona in other words. How to fake it. This corporate nonsense to deceive, be false so you can sell S@it
    Good for politicians & Grifting

  18. @TalulahMoon

    June 6, 2026 at 7:01 am

    It's a "skill" …….used to manipulate people, control conversations and peoples impressions of you. To get things. Relationships. Jobs. Sex. Clout. It's inherently a very real effort ("skill") for those people insecure in the 'real them' using a performative but FALSE version of themselves to maintain a controlling grip on a situation. I don't want to be "more likeable" – I want to be ME so that those who like me want to stick around. I don't want to attract people that only like a version of myself so I need to "on" around them control the situation and to sustain the fake relationship I have now entered in to. This is a 'how to make it in the corporate world" not how to be an authentically connected and communicative person.
    Just, no.

  22. @miqe8848

    June 6, 2026 at 7:01 am

    That`s funny. on other podcast she recogrnizes being a partially psychopath, as those skills for her are not natural, but synthetically trained. she gives me an impression of a replicant, rather a proper human being

  23. @hankswan

    June 6, 2026 at 7:01 am

    Adds are insufferable… eyebrow raise and eye roll … combined with a raised middle finger … guess what I’m trying to say ….

  25. @Kieran0

    June 6, 2026 at 7:01 am

    I'm 90 seconds in and I already call bullshit on this.

    "You only have a few seconds to make an impression"

    I've met hundreds of people who … At 1st glance I wouldn't think we're especially interesting or memorable but after a brief conversation turned out to be super engaging and interesting.

  26. @RedOctober2011

    June 6, 2026 at 7:01 am

    This is super complicated. Just the kind of thing…. you would need a "course" for. Like, many, courses.. and more courses… and more courses. each costing munny.

  27. @HeNeverKnowsForever

    June 6, 2026 at 7:01 am

    A few minutes in and I think It’s funny how I find people like this untrustworthy, disingenuous and inauthentic. I know that’s part of my stuff I need to work on but it is what it is. Plus I thought most people can’t sus out real authenticity anyway…. Meh. Let me finish this thing. Ha.

  29. @ssjj6070

    June 6, 2026 at 7:01 am

    She is a tall woman, wearing high hills; she’s seating in a low chair with legs crossed; which makes her knees very high… I feel uneasy watching her.

  30. @KimJayViet

    June 6, 2026 at 7:01 am

    Thank you for this. I know many people on the autism spectrum who have problems reading the room and this organized list of tips re social cues is so necessary to share. I wish we had more of that instruction when my son was in grade school. It would've helped everyone out, not just the neuro-atypical people.

  38. @HakuCell

    June 6, 2026 at 7:01 am

    i'm skeptical of this video title. authenticity is the way. you can't "fake" a personality, it's gonna give you anxiety or something.

  42. @miadietrich7347

    June 6, 2026 at 7:01 am

    I think pretty much all of this can be distilled to "be genuinely interested in the person across from you." I find that all of this follows naturally if you put yourself in that mindset. Don't think about yourself, your posture, your cues. Just pay attention to the other person, and be curious.

Comments are closed.

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