Gen Z’s retreat from dating and sex | The Gray Area
Sean talks with writer Christine Emba about the strange and increasingly anti-social world young people are inheriting online. They discuss the rise of “looksmaxxing,” the manosphere, Gen Z’s retreat from dating and sex, and how the internet has transformed what might have been normal insecurities into a permanent state of anxiety and self-optimization. Along the way, they explore loneliness, intimacy, masculinity, social media, and what happens to a society when human connection starts to feel unbearable.
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Host: Sean Illing (@seanilling)
Guest: Christine Emba (@ChristineEmba)
00:00 Intro
01:47 The world of looksmaxxing: incels, bone smashing, and drugs
12:18 The digital doom loop: anxiety, optimization, and the death of dating
21:20 The growing gender divide of Gen Z
28:25 When digital substitutes replace real connections
38:27 Is the internet designed to destroy human connection?
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@Miiiiiiii33
May 29, 2026 at 2:05 pm
I mean I’m genz and I would like to date, I’m currently trying to put myself out there
@bermei5187
May 29, 2026 at 2:05 pm
The saddest thing is they'll waste years of their lives caring so much about this that when they finally get some, they'll realize how shallow and superficial it is and how that doesn't feel good at all. Take it from a millennial who's been down this exact road.
@jenmar9428
May 29, 2026 at 2:05 pm
I just watched a BBC documentary about the manosphere and red‑pill ideology. It’s striking how much time people spend on their phones. The entire manosphere/red‑pill ecosystem has essentially become a business model, profiting from men who struggle with insecurity and low self‑esteem.
@TheStickCollector
May 29, 2026 at 2:05 pm
How can i not hate something when i am jealous of people who do get to date? I have never been on a date and i doubt that will change in the near future.
@cayrenisaturtle
May 29, 2026 at 2:05 pm
I know as a Gen Z-er I haven't really been dating because I have focused on my education and career goals instead. I would rather accomplish those plans than put time and energy into people that it may or may not work out with.
@Coconut7403
May 29, 2026 at 2:05 pm
I don't get why people care we don't date… There are more than enough people on the planet.
@CalvezJohnJohnYT
May 29, 2026 at 2:05 pm
when 90% women are on OF or selling feet pics, why would you blindly want to commit to a relationship?
@beingofhorizon
May 29, 2026 at 2:05 pm
I think it is a ego or money thing
@helton3425
May 29, 2026 at 2:05 pm
It takes 2 to tango, so the best contraceptive is being alone ☺️
@Nowthengeez
May 29, 2026 at 2:05 pm
I’m 28 and I have gone from dating regularly, had loads of girlfriends and been on more dates than I could count. But the past 2 years I haven’t been on a single date, seem to get nowhere with women anymore and I couldn’t really say why.
@lfcbpro
May 29, 2026 at 2:05 pm
women want 6,
6+ figures and they will forget about everything else.
@caleb6590
May 29, 2026 at 2:05 pm
Men and women both have issues when it comes to dating. The funniest part is when people feel like they’re entitled to your exclusivity. Like um…we’ve only been on one date! You have to be willing to put in the effort to get to know someone before talking about exclusivity. You have to determine fit, compatibility, and common values. You could be attached to an ex, you could have bitter friends/family in your ear, you could be someone who gets complacent in a relationship. OR you could be everything I’ve been looking for. But it takes time to discern the truth and people shouldn’t be in a relationship until they figure out that truth!
@iloveyouMeg43
May 29, 2026 at 2:05 pm
Biloxi, MS!!!!
@az55544
May 29, 2026 at 2:05 pm
I wouldn't want to date a gen Z 😬
@rollingknuckleball
May 29, 2026 at 2:05 pm
ban fornication
@navdeepdanner0088
May 29, 2026 at 2:05 pm
Thanks to feminism
@ng855
May 29, 2026 at 2:05 pm
The worst she can do is call the police